Saturday 20 November 2010

How long more?

The incident

Republic Polytechnic student Darren Ng Wei Jie, 19, who suffered multiple slash wounds and a stab wound to his abdomen before he died, was a victim of a 'staring incident'.

We are calling him a 'victim' because he was a casualty in the incident. The fact is, he could have been one of those arrested if he had made another boy a 'victim'.

He was just a teenage boy, just 19. An age where everything was about to blossom: his hard work in his studies, relationships at different levels, his values and beliefs in life, his aspiration, his ambition, his parents' hopes and dreams for him.

Everything will dissipate with his bloody and brutal departure.

The four murderers who were arrested were not much older. They were just in their early 20s. And they were called 'men' in the reports.

I cannot imagine the pain Darren's parents felt, and feel.

An auntie cleaner in a company I worked in once told me,"I would rather beat my own child to death than let him be beaten to death by others. Imagine how painful that is if your child is killed by someone else when you have painstakingly brought up a child."

Soon after the Downtown East incident, another slashing incident happened in Bukit Panjang. Then, a third one took place in Ang Mo Kio.

These youths think what? Slashing is fun is it? Or they want to ride on the 'fame' of the Downtown East incident?

It could be a job hazard, but I can't help but feel that it boils down to the lack of parental supervision and the powerlessness of our education system.

Our society has got to a point that only double income for a family can suffice. For most people, it is not a choice.

The background

MM Lee had encouraged women, especially degree-holders, to continue working after getting married and giving birth as he saw the value of the female workforce's contribution to the country's economy.

After all, his all-capable wife had done the same. She went to work as a lawyer, came home to have lunch with the children, and went back to work again. And she managed her roles as a working woman and a caring and disciplining mother very well.

He probably could not understand why the rest of the woman population are not as able. Either that or he could have attributed to our inaptness at juggling both roles to laziness or stupidity.

The fact is, most of us do not hold as highly-paid a job as either one of them. And most of our jobs are not as 'cushy' as theirs. I'll leave the reader to define 'cushy' by their own definition.

'Staring incident' is not new to my era. I remember reading about clashes over stupid youths staring at each other on papers when I was in primary school and secondary school, but fortunately the clashes seldom became fatal.

The stares could have been between two boys, or a girl who was taken being glanced at repeatedly by another boy. I thought it silly to fight over an incidental fall of an eye. And if it happens that your girl has been eyed, shouldn't you feel flattered that other boys find your girl attractive instead?

My take

Whenever I see youths killing each other, vandalising property, slashing out at their elders, be it teachers or parents - pardon me, but I can't help but sadistically gloat somewhat, not over the incidents, but over the reflection of the extent of damages that have been done to the education system. In my opinion, all these abnormal societal happenings are a result of the failure in home and school education.

Children are truly just clay. What you want them to be, you mould. They will manifest the process of moulding or what have been done to them in their childhood when they become youths and adults - that is the time when they are empowered, by the passing of time.

Today's society has done all it can to suppress or hit out at the education system in school. The same people who commit the atrocity to schools, and display scan respect for educators are probably the same parents who fail to teach their children well, be it the academic or character development.

Just like breastfeeding, the effects will not show up immediately. It takes time, and when they do, nothing will be able to stop them, until the yesterday's children are caught up by the law. By then, how much damages have been done to these young lives? And how much damages have these youths done to others' lives?

How long more must it take before people, especially parents, realise that children need discipline as much as they need love and protection?

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